Power of Choice

What a difference a year makes. Last fall I landed in a new town. Literally, that was what it felt like, a landing. I arrived back to the States from a 6 month journey in India not knowing what I wanted to do or where I wanted to live. All arrows pointed to Aiken, South Carolina. Since arrows pointing versus a "pin the tail on the donkey" choice seemed the wiser of the two, here I find myself 15 months later with a brand new life beyond my imagination.  And that is real life... existing beyond the limitations of our imagination. 

I had been in search of freedom, becoming less and less attached to things, to people, to comfort zones, but I still wasn't liberated. I have discovered something new this past year. I think I was approaching detachment from the wrong perspective. What keeps us bound are our thoughts and beliefs, not our things, our relationships or our comfort zones. We experience limitations, because we believe our thoughts.

The mind is like a computer. We must be aware of what we are downloading into it. Discernment is a powerful tool. Decide to accept and reject. We need to free ourselves from the limitations we have accepted in the here and now. Freedom will never happen in the future, as it is an awareness of the moment. A new thought is like soft clay. It can be reshaped. An old thought fired in the kiln of our emotions has to be broken with a sledge hammer.

I find myself more entangled with the world at present, more commitments and more responsibilities than in my "freedom searching" years; however, I have found greater freedom in my newly entangled life. Interesting, when you are not searching for something, you are more likely to happen upon it. A few months ago a good friend reminded me something about myself and gave me some powerful advice. She said, "You need to always remember you have an amazing endurance for accepting things that don't work for you."  It really made me think. Do I want to endure my life, or do I want to live it? I choose to live it.

Don't get me wrong. Acceptance is important. Without it we would surely go mad, as most events that occur in our life are beyond our control. But we don't have to accept our imagined limitations. Imagination has countless building blocks. We can use them to build walls that close us in or doorways that open us to the expansiveness of life.

Confusion can be a very good thing. It takes away the security that we have all the answers in our pocket. Freedom from concepts allows new experience. Preconceived ideas keep out truth. The need to believe something often interferes with our reasoning, as we have a tendency to believe what we want to believe. Observation is the most helpful tool in freeing ourselves from preconceived ideas and beliefs. We suffer from undirected, uncultivated minds, such an unnecessary waste of life.

Mind as the interpreter is a very tricky thing, as it only hears what it wants to hear. The chattering of the subconscious can be loud and overpowering. Reflection is the key. Sit and watch your mind. Deal with what comes up. Use your power of choice and be discriminant of the thoughts you entertain. Don't allow mind to spin out of control with negative thoughts and fears. Feel passionately in the moment, but release emotions attached to the past.

We learn from making mistakes. Learn from them, but stop repeating them. Be clear on what you know versus what you have simply intellectualized. When you intellectualize, you pretend to yourself you know. True knowing leads to action. Watch your actions to understand what you truly know. It's best not to waste time on questions that can't be answered. Self-mastery is the key to liberation. 

Spend a few moments before going to sleep to clear your mind. The thoughts you are holding onto when you fall asleep are the thoughts that most strongly affect your subconscious. Gratitude keeps us in divine flow. Forgiveness is love manifest. I go to sleep this evening with my heart overflowing gratitude for my rich, full life, for all my entanglements with the world, for all my freedom, for all my mistakes, and all the my successes. As my mind defragments from the day, forgiveness wells up in my consciousness for the holy mess I am, for the holy mess I create and for the holy mess caused by others. Perfection cannot manifest on the human level. God does not work for us. God works through us. The right choice always is simply seek God.